Kareena lands Hollywood role

Bollywood’s quintessential tart has now found her way to Hollywood somehow! I’m talking, of course, of none other than the dumber Kapoor sister, Kareena.

One of the many projects offered to her is a movie directed by Daniel Silverman (The Devil Wears Prada & Perfect Strangers), titled ‘Chamera’ where she’ll star opposite Billy Zane (Caledon or ‘Cal’ of Titanic).

Apparently, ‘she fits the role perfectly.’ I can just imagine what that is…

Kareena gets her hands dirty while taking the support of a railing in order to climb a flight of stairs in her 6- inch high stilettos. She reaches the top of the stairs outside a very fancy Café when she pulls out a handkerchief to wipe her hands but – Oh No! What’s this?! Her handkerchief has fallen to the ground? Whatever shall she do? Her skirt’s too short for her to bend over and her ‘pleather’ tank-top is way too tight to allow movement!

That’s when her knight in shining scalp will come along and pull her out of her misery.

How perfect is that? I bet she’ll be a natural, given a role like that.

I guess she’ll be okay provided she’s not required to actually speak in English because then she’ll just end up embarrassing herself and the whole country with her badly strung sentences.

Clearly Sean Kingston’s never come across Aishwarya Rai if he’s writing songs about Bebo and her bushy eyebrows. I mean, come on! So the girl’s gone from plump to skanky and is dating an actor thrice her age - is that really enough to make a her a superstar?

I certainly hope not!!!